nosatalgia

well, nostalgia has a way of sucking the breath out of me. it often happens when the weather changes...changes....quite alot i have been through and am going through. feeling the effects of getting older. liking the settled feeling and disliking the restless feeling. seems as though i am in the restless place alot. so very grateful for my life and friends. so very disappointed by the fact that i have not had a really healthy relationship ever which really really has made me quite cynical to say the least. relationships baffle me. on one hand i want one, on the other, i am too independent. it is all so very very weird.